The practice of tonglen came to Tibet in the 11th century by way of India. During that period in Tibetan history, a wave of leprosy rolled through the country. Buddhist monks used tonglen as a method of long-distance healing for those who fell ill.² 

The literal meaning of tonglenelegantly describes its mechanism of action: “Tong” translates from Tibetan as “sending out” or “releasing” and “len” translates as “receiving” or “accepting.” With tonglen, pain and challenging feelings are first received on the inhale. Then, compassion, spaciousness, and relief are sent out on the exhale.¹ Although tonglen has roots in Buddhism, it has gained traction as a widely recognized mental health support tool in psychotherapy and other secular arenas.²  Tonglen can be practiced in two ways: informally (e.g., doing a brief version during the middle of an argument) or formally (i.e., taking time on your own to do the full four-stage process).¹

Narcissism and lack of empathy aren't just interpersonal issues—they're global ones.

Wetiko is a character or archetype described in Algonquin myths as a cannibalistic spirit driven by insatiable hunger. The wetiko archetype has been explored by both contemporary Native American and non-Native writers to understand the psychospiritual root of our current global polycrisis.

According to the CPTSD Foundation, “People with codependency sometimes form relationships with [people with narcissism] and they develop complementary roles. The [person with codependency] has found a person they can pour themselves into and the [person with narcissism] has found someone who will always put them first.”¹ The needs and desires of each party in the relationship interlock in an ultimately destructive way that can feel like a train heading fast to nowhere—or, at the very least, a very painful destination.